Log Kya Kahenge? (What will people say!) I’ll tell you exactly what some of them said.
When you enter an interracial relationship, you should be prepared for comments from somewhere because shockingly in 2022…people still have issues with it. So pathetic. Sadly, in some cultures, the comments are worse than others because marrying outside of your community let alone outside of the culture is still shunned. The comments I heard were made by some family members and friends – most were good, but some were bad. The bad ones stung…but also was extremely eye opening as to closeted racism that exists within the family and community.
- “Watch…in a few years she will come crawling home after he leaves her with 1 or 2 kids.” – Family
- “Doesn’t she know she’s ruining our genes!” – Family
- “I always knew she wasn’t going to marry an Indian but a Kala (black)?!” – Family
- “Well, we don’t care what he looks like, if he’s a good person with a good education and head on his shoulders that’s all we care about.” – Family
- “As long as you are happy…then I am happy!” – Family & Friends
- “Who gives a f*^# about what anyone thinks, it’s your life not theirs!” – Friend
Yes…my marriage is going to ruin our family genetics because that’s how science works! The saddest thing is that these are comments made due to disgusting stereotypes that Indians themselves have their own battle against. We can’t feed the prejudice that we equally hate. Do you know how many times I heard comments about owning gas stations or asked if I ever had curry for lunch that stunk up the lunchroom? Why would I ever want to participate in that kind of racist commentary and ignorance by doing the same to someone of another ethnicity? Especially when I’m fighting my own!
Did the remarks hurt – of course! Was I angry – you bet your ass I was! Did I let it stop me – nope! People are always going to talk and have opinions. Whether you marry within your culture, or someone of the same gender, decide to quit your job, go back to school in your mid 30s, stop eating meat, color your hair purple, gain weight or lose it, buy the expensive shoes, splurge on a car, or save every penny and rarely go out… someone is always going to have something to say or gossip about. So, who cares, live your life the way you want to…the way you deserve. Your happiness is yours to control and you will never regret choosing it.